On Reclining Seats (And Your Sanity)

On Reclining Seats (And Your Sanity)

The debate is flaring up about whether it’s okay to recline your economy seat after a video of a man punching the back of an airplane seat went viral

Evidently, the woman (sitting in front) acquiesced to keeping her seat upright during the meal, but then reclined her seat afterwards – which is when he started punching the back of her chair (and she started filming). 

The commentary is polarized. Some say that reclining your seat is practically immoral and rude now that the distance between seats is so small; whereas frequent travellers note that the only way to survive is to stake out your territory early so you can catch a few zzz’s. 

During graduate school, I was travelling on transatlantic flights sometimes as frequently as two roundtrip flights a month. This question has plagued and frustrated me for years. With the FAA rejecting any minimum seat requirements for planes, we had better sort this out. Let’s take a look at the psychology of personal space and all the ways (not just seat pitch!) people can steal space from you on the plane… and what to do about it.

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My bear, Cinnamon, living his best life on the plane.

This is Really About Personal Space

Although we don’t see much use of the words personal space in the coverage of this viral issue in the media, this is the underlying theme of the seat reclining debate.

Personal space is a deeply emotional thing, impacting our sense of safety, anxiety, and comfort. In North America, we are comfortable with a distance of 2 – 4 feet between us and another person; anything less than 2 feet can create a sense of anxiety (or could be considered ‘intimate’, depending on the context). 

This sense of anxiety from close proximity is only heightened by the fact that those in our personal space when travelling are strangers. It can be compounded by the fact that some people are nervous flyers, or are tired from travelling, or are travelling for some emotionally-charged purpose (wedding, funeral, business trip, etc.). 

We also feel a sting of anxiety when our sense of control is diminished – as it is on a flight. We can’t choose the people around us, or to make the screaming baby be quiet, or even basic things like when we go to the bathroom or drink water. We also take a hit to our sense of privacy, which can increase our feelings of stress on a flight (yep, I am definitely taking a peek at the magazine my seat-mate is reading. Not because I am nosy, but because I am bored).

There are a number of factors that affect our sense of personal space: gender (and gender role), culture, age, personal preferences and personality (introvert and extrovert), room density, context, etc. For example, imagine sitting in the middle seat on a plane and how close the people are to you. Now imagine being on a subway train with only a handful of people on it and the seatmates sitting that close to you on the subway train – it would be weird. However, research has shown that when it comes to flying, there is no difference in nationality, age, or gender in terms of who we feel comfortable violating our personal space. If it’s a stranger, we feel violated. 

And what happens when we feel our personal space is violated? A range of negative emotions that includes irritation, discomfort, and anger. Violations of personal space in a sensory way can lead to nausea and disgust (like in the case of unwanted smells), and even claustrophobia. 

With more and more incidents happening on planes – are customers more unruly or is the lack of space to blame?

Friends, when we look at budget economy flying through the lens of violations of personal space, it’s not just about leg room. There’s lots of ways your space can be violated. Read on.

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Cinnamon and I making the most of a no seat-mate situation.

The Ways Our Personal Space Is Violated

Airplane Seat Pitch

In the past 20 years, average legroom (known as ‘pitch’) has shrunk by 4 inches. Unfortunately, the average length of people’s legs has not shrunk by 4 inches (or at all). Before seat deregulation, the pitch for an economy seat was usually around 36”, now we are seeing some as small as 28”. Unless you’re a child, this is uncomfortable at the best of times. 

Although I am a normal-heighted (and pretty bendy) person, I (and other work travellers) find these modern pitches to sometimes be too small to even take out my computer out to do work on the plane. (In consulting, that’s a real problem). Unfortunately, sometimes only low-cost carriers fly a particular route so choice can be a problem for which airlines can offer the best pitch. It’s not just leg room, it’s often the distance between your nose and the next seat that feels absolutely claustrophobic. 

Seat Width

Seat width has also reduced over the years - by an average of 2 inches. Asking us to reduce the width of our behinds by 2” in kind is of nuts, so this undoubtedly leaves us feeling uncomfortable. 

Another consequence? We are now closer than ever to our seat neighbours. Which could be fine, or could be a DISASTER. Have you ever been a victim of seat sprawl

Horror Story: On one of my transatlantic flights, I sat beside a woman who took off her shoes (which I do on flights too) to expose bare feet, tucked them under her, and I had this women’s literal bare feet on my legs for the bulk of the flight. No amount of uncomfortable body language would dissuade her. It was gross. 

Arm Rests

Who gets the arm rest? Most sources agree that the person in the middle (interior) gets the armrest. As the small person who always is forced into the middle seat, I have to say I have NEVER seen this rule adhered to. I do often have the elbows of some strange man in my sides. Maybe he doesn’t have a problem touching me but I have a problem with it.

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Cinnamon says… just buy me a seat!

Tips to Preserve Your Sanity on Long Flights

What can we do to protect our sense of well-being and our sanity on a flight? Here are a few tips. Actually precisely 5 categories of tips:

Do Your Research

Know what you are getting into. Seat information based on airline, class of fare, and route can be found on various sites like SKYTRAX. Look it up and allow yourself time to mentally prepare. If your legs are simply longer than the pitch, you’re going to have to either upgrade or pay extra to sit in the emergency aisle.

Horror Story: I recall one of my first transatlantic flights travelling by myself, I had logged on early to select a really good seat and I was proud of myself for being so organized. It was the first row of economy (a tiny bit extra leg room!). I had the window seat originally but switched with my seatmate who has a kid who wanted to see out the window. Before the flight pushed back, a flight attendant came up to me and told me I had to move a few rows back to accommodate a male passenger with long legs. I explained to her that I had very purposefully selected this seat – and why didn’t she ask any of the other passengers? (I was the only young female to approach, let’s just say that!). Eventually I was so upset and embarrassed with her persistence that I moved back. Pretty humiliating! 

If you Need to Sleep – Opt for the Upgrade

A study compared the quality of sleep for passengers in a seat that was 18” wide compared to 17” wide. Over 60% of passengers reported sleeping better in the larger of the two seats, and had fewer twitches and fell asleep faster. If you can afford it, and you need to sleep, opt for the emergency exit aisle or premium economy, or try to take the day flight instead. 

Every Person For Themselves 

Don’t count on the flight attendants to have your back. The woman in the viral video asked the flight attendant for help, at which point the flight attendant sided with the man in the seat. Flight attendants have a dynamic job where they need to be concerned with safety and service, in sometimes a very short amount of flying time. They probably see the same problem all the time with the seats – since it’s the function of the aircraft making people’s behaviour turn nasty. I’d even suggest trying to work it out with your seatmate first before turning to the flight attendants. It’s not the flight attendants or the passengers – it’s the environment or context that is shaping behaviour. Let the airlines know (not the flight attendants – who can’t do anything about it) you are unhappy with the seats. The more they hear from us that it’s more than just squeezing profits, the more likely they are to make a change. 

Make The First Move

One of my favourite techniques is that I make a little gesture that shows I respect the passengers around me. A little hello, helping them put their bag into the overhead bins (plus I get to show off how strong my biceps are…), very deliberately moving my things out of the way for them, offering them a snack (“do you want my pretzels?”), letting them know they can ask at any time to get past me to head to the washrooms, etc. These are all little things that essentially say “I understand it’s cramped in here, but we are in this together!!!!” Response has been good, and often I get some respect back.

It’s a lot harder to do that to the people in the seats in front of you. Two things we could bring back is communication and basic manners. In the case of the man-punching-woman’s-seat-viral-video altercation of late, the Airline representative the woman consulted after the fact reportedly said the whole thing could have been avoided if both parties were simply more polite to each other. But the woman reportedly had a neck issue, and didn’t say anything to the man about it.

So let’s try this: If you are really uncomfortable with someone putting their seat back – tell them. We know that there is no real unwritten rule about people ‘not’ putting their seats back; we have to stand up for ourselves. Bargain: ask if they can put their seat back at only certain times. Or only part way. They might not always agree, but it’s worth a try, right? 

Communication, People!

If things get really rough, I’ve found some different communication techniques to help you if you need to talk to your seat-mates. 

1) Friendly Conversation: make friends first. It’s much easier to ask for something once you know the person’s name.

2) Be Direct But Kind: Ask for what you need directly, but do it in a kind way. For example, ”With a smile on your face, say something like, "Excuse me, would you mind moving your elbow? It's such a tight space on planes these days."

If you are the person reclining your seat: be considerate. Keep your seat upright at meals. Check if the person behind you needs to work on a laptop. Maybe even ask if it’s okay to lower your seat. When you do, do it slowly. And maybe not all the way. Or maybe not at all, unless it’s a really long flight and you need to sleep. 

Use Invisible Personal Space Barriers

Psychology has some tips for helping you feel like you have control over your personal space in crowded situations. If someone is too close or ‘in your bubble’, an immediate tactic to reduce a sense of anxiety is to not make eye contact. Try taking control of your senses: earplugs, eyeshade, a good set of noise-cancelling headphones, your own choice of snack, a travel outfit with a textile that feels comforting to you, etc. Noise is an important consideration too: people who won’t stop talking to you can also feel like an invasion of personal space. Here is a webpage with 6 ‘tools’ to protect your person space. 

Final Note: A Solution

A very simple solution to this seat reclining debate has been found by Orion Buses in Japan. The seats on the buses are fully reclined before the passengers board the bus. Doing so encourages passengers to put away their things in the overhead bins (instead of in their immediate personal space) for maximum comfort. And then – any changes to seat recline feels like an expansion of the passengers’ space. Although airline seats are hampered by the fact that seats MUST be in the upright position for take-off, this solution has some inspirational elements to it. Perhaps airlines should save their reputation by thinking through the same problem – or even starting the flight with an announcement reminding everyone to simply be polite to each other. Food for thought!

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Cinnamon and I send our best wishes from Business Class!

Love,

Dr. D

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