On Self-Sabotage

We’ve all been there. Facing a big exam, a big game, a big meeting. Sometimes the pressure is almost too much to take!

Sometimes, but not all the time, it’s possible to observe people becoming so overwhelmed by the pressure that they throw the game, they ruin their chances before even getting to the field. I’m talking about self-sabotage.

What is the Definition of Self-Sabotage?

Self-sabotage, or self-handicapping, is a behavioural strategy adopted by people facing highly stressful moments to protect their self-esteem from a potential failure. This subconscious process is motivated by the need to externalize failure… and this is done by throwing up some self-imposed obstacles. For example, staying up late before a big test, procrastinating studying or preparing for a presentation, even not being cautious about safety before a big game are all examples of self-sabotage, meaning you are leaving yourself vulnerable to sickness or injury. Self-sabotage looks like anything you could have taken steps to prepare for but didn’t.

How Does Self-Attribution Theory Help to Explain Self-Sabotage?

Self-attribution theory explains that people are motivated to preserve a positive self-image. We have an innate desire to see ourselves in a positive light, and the way we see ourselves is known as our self-image, a part of our identity of being a capable and good person. Anything that might change one’s ability to think of him or herself in a positive light is an identity threat.

As individuals have multifaceted identities, the more core a certain aspect of our self-identity is, the more we are motivated to protect our view of ourselves having this quality in a positive way. For example, I’m a competitive figure skater. My abilities and self-image as a successful figure skater depend on me seeing myself in a positive way and also being seen in this way by close others. Doing badly at a competition would threaten my ability to think of myself in a positive way as a figure skater. Having something to attribute failure to (e.g., “I was sick on competition day”, “I didn’t get enough sleep”) lessens the blow to my self-image. I might even subconsciously self-sabotage and not go to bed until really, really late so I have something to blame the outcome on rather than accepting that I might just be losing my edge (haha, get it?).

A number of self-sabotage behaviors have been identified, from alcohol use and drug abuse to getting too little sleep before a test. Self-sabotage can take the form of excuses, and - at the extreme - phenomena like hypochondriasis. Self-sabotaging behavior fuzzies the causal attributions between action and outcome, such that the outcome, should it be considered a failure, is more attributed to the circumstances rather than the individual, thereby reducing potential damage to self-esteem.

Self-Sabotage Has Two Core Components

1. The aspect of the self that would be threatened by the potential failure is core to the self-concept;

2. There exists and uncertainty about the outcome of the challenge the individual is facing, and that uncertainty is above a threshold of comfort/control that it motivates the creation of self-constructed obstacles.

It might be hard to identify and stop self-sabotage in yourself. Once I knew what the concept was, I was able to recognize it when it cropped up in others’ behaviours or my own.  Its one thing to see a friend self-sabotage , but what about a teammate, who’s insecurities might actually be threatening the success of the group as a whole? Although by very nature being a part of a team already lessens the direct negative self-attributions that can come from a failure at the team-level, what can you do to prevent self sabotage behavior on the part of a friend or teammate?

How To Deal With a Self-Sabotaging Teammate

First, Identify

Those who’s self-image is most at risk for failure might be likely candidates to self-sabotage. Look at who’s self-image seems highly connected to the task at hand. This might be a helpful tip, or it might be confusing – in an ideal world all team members would feel passionate about the team’s work and incorporate it into their self-image. Alternatively, look for signs of low self-esteem. Someone who might not be able to take the pangs of failure.

Then, Prevent

As self-esteem is intrinsically tied to self-sabotage, meaning one strategy is to boost up your teammate. Reassure them of his or her skills and value. Point to past successes and wins in the relevant area… “you’ve done this a million times before!”. Another strategy is to downplay the importance of the event and its significance; “this game isn’t even going to be broadcast on TV!” Downplaying the event might serve as less of a threat to the self in the case of failure. If you are a coach: practice! Give your team lots of chances to practice under stressful conditions so that they learn how to deal with stress and nerves.

Finally, Repair

In the case that a teammate has self-sabotaged and created an extra obstacle for themselves (and therefore you as a team), react with compassion. Ultimately this is coming from a place of low self-esteem rather than a place of malicious intention. If this self-sabotage behavior is repeated, it might be helpful to recommend that the teammate to get some additional help and support.

Now go out there and believe in yourselves!

Love,

Dr. D

Postscript

Self-sabotage can be done not only to protect self-esteem but also to impress others or enhance one’s self-image – although, behavioural scientists claim this is much less prevalent. Research in this area is tightly tied to self-esteem and understanding self-sabotaging behaviors that are motivated to preserve positive self-image. Research has found that mostly those with relatively high self-esteem used self-sabotage behaviors to self-enhance to others rather than to protect their self-image.