Nov 15

Nov 15 On The Big Purse Principle

Why is it that the bigger my purse, the more stuff I seem to carry around? Shouldn’t it be that I have my essentials and the size of the bag is irrelevant? It turns out we are wired to seek out more… and more, and more! But what are we going to do about it?

Intended Audience: Emerging adults, workin’ women, professionals, executives, retirees.

Here’s a pickle for you. A little irrationality I like to call the Big Purse Principle. I discovered it when I was absolutely destroying everyone at the standard bridal shower game lovingly known as “What’s In Your Purse”. I have a Longchamps Le Pliage handbag (I am basic), it fits my computer. No, I don’t take my computer to bridal showers. And while I was racking up all the points, I started to wonder… what the heck is all this stuff in my purse?

Be honest with me, please. Tell me I’m not the only one. But it seems like the bigger the purse, the more I fill it. Rather than the quantity of my essentials staying the same no matter the size of the handbag.

This isn’t just a call out for the ladies and the men with man-bags.

Let me ask… what about your closets? Are they full? What about your garage? You junk drawer in the kitchen?

If you’ve ever been in an old house, you’ll notice that closets are rare at best. By the 1950s, small closets were considered standard in the houses of middle and lower-class homes. Then, the 1980s happened, and the walk-in closet was born. And now we drool over Carrie Bradshaw’s closet-palace in the movie Sex and the City 2.

Time to fill that new closet with stuff?

I started thinking more and more about this, digging a little deeper into the research. Here is what I found:

The self-storage market is BOOMING. Canadians have an average of 3 square feet of self-storage. But wait, Americans have an average of 9 square feet per person. There are over 3,000 facilities in Canada.
According to NPR, the average size of the American home has tripled over the past 50 years (yet people still pay for storage!!!)
Almost half of American households don’t save any money from their income, and spend $1.2 trillion annually on nonessential goods.

I recently sat down to watch a new show on Netflix called Get Organized with The Home Edit, a show about Clea and Joanna’s closet makeovers. I was sure this show would be my cup of tea because I love organizing things, but I was immediately taken aback by a few realizations. First of all, their first on-screen client was show’s producer Reese Witherspoon (love!), and their task was to organize a closet that was about the size of the footprint of my own house, with some of Hollywood’s most famous and expensive gowns. This is clearly a business accessible to only the very rich. And there was almost no editing. It was a celebration of grotesque palatial closets, with things on display rather than function. It was a celebration of consumerism. (Although, admittedly, I thought they did a very good job. The finished product was gorgeous. Perhaps I’m more of a Marie Kondo fan).

I’m going to try to explain what’s going on here.

Hedonic Adaptation

Hedonic adaptation refers to how we often adjust to our context and return to a baseline level of happiness and satisfaction. For example, lottery winners tend to report an approximate same level of happiness after winning as compared to before. And the same thing goes for people who have been in debilitating accidents. Here’s a question for you: have you ever bought something that you are SO excited about, only to get bored and tired of it? Our children certainly do. The Telegraph found that the average British 10-year-old owns 238 toys but plays with just 12 on a daily basis. Our adaptation to the joy brought to us by stuff results in a bunch of things being shoved into the closet, and an impulse to buy more to engage that pleasure sensation.

Social Comparison

Ever heard of Keeping Up With the Jones’? We are attuned to cues from our social references (i.e., the people around us) about which behaviours are considered acceptable and appropriate. So if you are constantly bombarded by other people buying things, well, you’re going to see that as the ‘norm’. Advertisers are well aware of this, and they will show you images of people just like you having the best time ever with their product. And you become far more likely to buy. Your comparison of your purchases with other people’s purchases also has an impact on your purchasing behaviour. Basically, you end up on the shopping treadmill. No wonder women spend more than 8 years of their lives shopping, and malls outnumber schools in the US.

Endowment Effect

The endowment effect refers to a phenomenon where we overvalue our own things simply because we own them. This happens because the feeling of loss (of something that mentally we consider is ours) hurts more than gaining that equivalent thing. And because we overvalue the things we own, it makes it a heck of a lot harder to get rid of it. Plus we are more likely to buy stuff about which we already feel a sense of ownership - like when we do test drives of a new car or get a free sample. Our dislike of the feeling of loss plays a role in our accumulation of stuff.

Not only do we despise the feeling of loss, our stuff actually has a powerful emotional hold over us. They link us to memories and emotions. And then there is the fear of making a wrong decision, getting rid of something that you might need down the line.

What Are We To Do?

Here are some ideas.

Spread out your ‘treats’. Research has identified that often our first bite of something tastes more delicious than the exact same bite later in the meal as we adapt to the pleasurable experience. By that same principle, having more variety helps us to thwart adaptation. A treat will feel more like a treat than the norm. Think of ways to apply this idea to your shopping! Maybe shopping less often, being diligent not to be lured into impulse buys, and thinking about ways you can reuse your existing stuff in a new context so that it feels new.
Compare healthily. We often do ‘upwards comparisons’ to people around us (or celebrities) that we admire. The Jones’ have a Porsche, and we don’t, so I feel unhappy. But wait a second, do we stop often enough to think about how much we actually have? Especially in comparison to those who have less than we do. It’s easy to forget about how 10 percent of the world’s population (or 734 million people) lived on less than $1.90 a day in 2015. But we don’t see many of these people. 11% of Canadians lived below the national poverty line in 2018. These are people who are not able to meet their basic needs like housing, food, or healthcare. It puts things in perspective. Truly, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills have lots of money, but they don’t seem all that happy.
Sort while staying one step ahead of the endowment effect. Now that you know the hold the endowment effect has on you, look it in the face and ask yourself if you are keeping an item because it’s valuable, useful, or special to you, or because your brain just simply likes things better than it already owns. Once you have let something go, pat yourself on the back. You can even visualize Marie Kondo smiling at you, whatever, just remember to celebrate success!

(For anyone interested in more frameworks for sorting clutter, I found this great article here).

It’s hard, but you’re strong. So get sorting! I’m going to start with my handbag.

Yours,